I’ve always enjoyed edging, even before I knew it had a name. Masturbating, stroking my cock until I’m close to coming, and then backing off until the urge recedes, then doing it again and again until I can’t take anymore… it leads to more powerful, more satisfying orgasms. (Even ruined ones, which I like sometimes too.)

Apparently at least one other person enjoys it when I edge too.

I have a new-ish play partner named Lani (not her real name) who, for two weeks, I denied her the permission to orgasm. We weren’t going to see each other in that time, and I wanted her to not only be tormented but also to explode when I touched her. In the intervening time, I talked to her about what we would do, what she would experience, and so on, and it just tortured her that much more.

While she was on restriction, I decided that I too would hold off. I mean, if I’d gotten together with another partner with whom I was intimate, I wouldn’t deny myself, but that didn’t happen, and for two weeks I was celibate. I mean, I edged, sure, but I didn’t come. I’m actually writing this post the day before we see each other, and I’m very much looking forward to covering her face with two weeks’ worth of come, the pressure built up from regular edging.

Edging that she wanted to watch.

I’m no stranger to playing on video. I’ve had long-distance partners and we’ve watched each other masturbate, and it’s been pretty hot. For some reason, they always like to see me come — maybe it’s the amount; everyone I’ve been in the past five or so years has commented on the amount of it. I drink a lot of water; I think that contributes. There’s also a “magic formula” that’s gone around Reddit for years that reportedly increases the amount, but I’ve never tried it.

But anyway, playing on video. I’ve made videos for partners before, and played live. Lani was interested in seeing me live. So we activated video on our phones, which was more difficult than it should have been — neither of us are iPhone users — and she watched me stroke my cock, slow and fast and slow again, pausing to show her what she would have down her throat and between her legs in only a few days, until I was close to coming. Then I would take my hand away and she would watch me throb until I came down, and we’d start all over again.

I got more than just physical pleasure out of it. I was also turned on by how turned on she was, and by how much additional torture I was putting her through. She begged me to come for her, pleaded for me to let her come, but neither happened. She told me how much she wanted me in her mouth, which probably only increased the pressure for her. The only reason she wasn’t edging too is because she was already so close that even the slightest touch might set her off, and I didn’t want that.

I edged for probably half an hour while she watched. It was so, so much fun.

Then, a few nights later, we did it again.

I can only imagine how strong my orgasm will be when I finally come on her face (we negotiated this; normally she swallows but I told her I wanted this and she consented). And I can only imagine how close I’m going to come to drowning when she is finally given permission to let go (she squirts or gushes, every time).

Here’s to living on the edge.