I came across the following on my Instagram feed, posted by supersmashcache:

I have noticed when I read romantasy (looking at you, Fourth Wing and Laurell K. Hamilton, though the latter is really more urban fantasy) that every male penis shown on the page is enormous. There’s the whole “can’t wrap two hands around it” thing (which is ridiculous), and there’s the fact that the woman is always aroused enough to just take this massive penis inside of herself with virtually no preparation other than what her body does naturally.

Look, y’all, even when you have a normal-sized penis, sometimes lube is required. I’m no Ron Jeremy or anything, but sometimes when I finish going down on Partner 1 she’s come so many times that she’s too tight for me to penetrate easily, and we have to use lube. This is not a problem, and it’s not negative, not for either of us. Lube exists to make sex easier. If you’re too uptight to use it, that’s on you.

And, in general, writers of spicy scenes, be they in erotica, romance, romantasy, urban fantasy, or whatever, need to stop focusing so much on penis size. The only reason I can think of why so many writers do is because (if they’re women) they’ve never had sex with someone with an overlarge penis and are only going by what they know from their sexual encounters with average-to-small penises or (if they’re men) they watch too much porn.

And, by the way — I’ve had sex with women who are petite, who are average-sized, and who are BBWs. Their body type has no bearing on how their sexual organs behave when being penetrated. One of the tall-ish curvy women I’ve had sex with was unfailingly so tight that it took a while to get her body ready for penetration (even after copious amounts of oral sex), and my 4’10 FWB from the mid-2010s could be penetrated after foreplay with no difficulty at all. So don’t assume.