Frolicon starts tomorrow. I’ve been a bunch of times, and I’ve learned a few things. Let me share them with you:
- It’s okay to blow off planned events. We all overschedule ourselves. It happens. There’s so much fun stuff to do at Frolicon and we want to do it all. But remember: you need down time. You need to eat, and breathe, and relax. Plan as much as you want, but if you need to blow off a planned event, don’t feel bad. It’s okay.
- Unless it’s with another person. If you make plans to do something with another person, whether it’s a scene or just hanging out, make every effort to keep those plans. Obviously sometimes things interfere, and that happens, and if it happens to you, be understanding. But if someone’s going to make time to spend with you, you should respect that if at all possible.
- There will be some things you don’t like. You may want to try something, and when you try it, you find that you don’t like it. This is not a personal failing. It’s okay to not like things.
- Don’t be too disappointed if your wishes don’t come true. There’s a wish board at Frolicon, and there are also wish lists on Fetlife and Discord. Post in them if you like, but don’t be too disappointed if they don’t come true. There are (IIRC) 3000 people who attend Frolicon over the course of four days; it’s entirely possible that you won’t connect with any of them in that regard. A wish board is just that: a place to put your wishes. Remember, most wishes don’t come true in real life either.
- Pre-plan your play sessions. Use the online wish boards, as well as your own personal connections, and pre-plan your play sessions. If you wait until the last minute, you may not end up playing at all.
- The dungeon can be distracting. There’s a lot of stuff going on in the dungeon, especially on Saturday night, and it can be distracting. Don’t let what’s going on around you detract from your scene.
- Talk to people. Most people who go to Frolicon are friendly. (I am one of those people.) And I would say a good percentage of them are introverts who have difficulty starting conversations. (I am one of those people too.) Make an effort to talk to people — especially people you’ve never met. You never know what kind of friends you’ll make.
- Pack less than you think you need. Trust me on this: you won’t need everything you bring. You’ll probably bring way more stuff than you’ll ever use or wear. Don’t bring your entire play bag, and don’t bring your entire wardrobe. You’ll probably need a maximum of seven outfits, and you can mix and match as needed.
- Let it recharge you. Hanging out with a lot of kinky people in an environment where no one needs to hide who they are is an amazing thing. Let Frolicon recharge you. Sure, you may be peopled out by the end of the weekend, but trust me, if you allow yourself to take in what the weekend brings, you will find yourself in a much better place overall.
- Have fun! You’re at Frolicon to have a good time. Let yourself have a good time. Do what makes you happy.
These items can be applied to other conventions as well — kinky or not. Maybe not exactly (after all, most sci-fi conventions don’t have dungeons), but close enough.