I recently came across a blog post entitled “20 Things Spanking Fetishists Have in Common”. It’s pretty accurate.

• Read Part 1 of my series here.
• Read Part 2 of my series here.

11. We all have our preferences.

I was recently invited to a private spanking party. It’ll be happening while I’m visiting my parents, so odds are good I’m not going to bring any implements with me. That’s fine; I love hand spanking. In fact, at spanking parties in general, especially for pickup play, I’ll stick to just using my hands. That said, I also really like giving hard, punishment-style paddle swats.

12. We enjoy associated activities.

True. I love butt sex. I love touching butts. I love looking at butts. And yes, I do enjoy temperature-taking and figging. And before you ask, I have tested figging on myself before doing it to anyone else. It hurts, but not unpleasantly so.

13. For us, spanking is its own category.

Partner 1 told me that, until she attended the Lone Star Spanking Party with me in 2022, she wasn’t truly aware that spanking is its own thing, and that being a spanko (whether top or bottom) isn’t the same as being into BDSM (as a top or bottom). It’s kind of like the old “a square is a rectangle” argument — a kinky person can be into spanking, but a spanko doesn’t necessarily have to be into any other kink.

14. We love every stage of the process.

One of Partner 2’s favorite things is when I take down her pants and panties. She could certainly do it herself — and I have told her to do it herself from time to time — but the process of it makes her happy, so I do it. And when I’m disciplining someone, I still “love” it even though I don’t love the fact that I have to deliver real discipline. I get fulfillment out of every stage of the spanking process.

15. We distinguish between different kinds of spankings.

Absolutely true. There are sexual spankings, foreplay spankings, punishment spankings, fun spankings… you name it. Even though I do get aroused in some way from all types of spanking, I subdivide them in my head so that I don’t act on it. When I’m spanking my “baby sister”, I never get an erection because we’ve always had that brother-sister type of relationship. When I’m spanking a random guy at a spanking party, I never get an erection because I know we’re not doing this specifically for sexual reasons. But if I know I’m going to get laid after this spanking, I let it happen. I distinguish between the different types from an arousal perspective.

The final post on this topic comes tomorrow.