Swiping is different when you’re saturated. Back when I was actively seeking new partners, I spent a lot of time on the swiping apps, mostly being ignored. But as things started to go from famine to feast, I backed off of them. Now I only go on one, and only when I’m bored and want to see if maybe I recognize anyone from a kink event or their Fetlife profile.
Last week I happened to match with someone local, and my first thought was, “do I really want to do this?” But, I mean, she seemed interesting, so I sent her a message. We talked for a couple of hours, but nothing really came of it except that we friended each other on Fetlife.
And honestly I’m relieved. I don’t really think I have the spoons to add another person, and what I’ve learned is that while I can have casual sex I prefer to at least be friends with the person. Then when we’re friends we start to care about each other, and before I know it I’m considering the person as one of “mine”.
I really ought to just uninstall the apps, but I spent a while on my profiles and I don’t want to lose them. Especially the OKC one. Which, by the way, is the one app I still check every now and again.
I think I should stop, though. I’ll accept new likes, and I’ll respond to messages, but I shouldn’t be swiping anymore. I’m saturated. And happy to be saturated.
But if I’m still wanting to swipe, am I truly saturated? I wonder.