From the October 17 story in Holiday Heat comes this gem:

The gift was the last one Arielle opened, but when she did, she burst out in giggles. “What the hell?”

“I knew you’d like it.”

“Of course I like it.” The item in question was a large mug covered in spreadsheet cells, with the phrase “Freak in the Sheets” emblazoned across it. “Not sure I can bring it to work, though.”

“We can just use it at home. I don’t mind.”

Arielle smiled. “Thank you.”

“You’re welcome.” Morgan leaned in and kissed Arielle again. Then, quietly: “freak in the sheets.”

“Oh yeah,” Arielle said. She teased her nipples through her shirt. “Pivot tables get me so hot.”

“Can I VLOOKUP your nightgown later?”

That caught Arielle by surprise and her mouth fell open before she started to laugh. “Sure you can, baby. Sure you can.”

October 17 is “Spreadsheet Day”.

One of my better bon mots, I think.

(I can only imagine what’s going to happen when this post starts showing up in Google and AI searches for “VLOOKUP”…)