In the lead-up to Oasis Labor Day 2025, I talked to a few people about giving them spankings. One of them, we started talking about a hand spanking, but it progressed into a more “standard” session discussion. Eventually Sunday rolled around, and we confirmed our scene before dinner. Then we went our separate ways.

After dinner, I met up with this person in the suites and we confirmed our scene again. She headed off to chat with some people, and after a few minutes I followed, thinking to ask her if we could play. When I got to the other room of the suite, though, she was already over someone else’s lap.

Intellectually I know that this happens at spanking parties: bottoms get spanked by lots of people (if they want to be). And I’ve certainly spanked people after others have spanked them. But for some reason I thought that she was going to make time for me right away, even though I didn’t say to her “hey, great to see you, let’s find a place to do our scene.” I try not to be pushy; I ask if people want to play, and then I generally try to let them take the lead as to whether or not it’s going to happen and when. Had I tried right away, I bet she would’ve been fine with us going to play. But I didn’t, and that’s probably on me.

Ultimately it all worked out; she just got a hand spanking from this other person, and then seemed very excited to do a full scene with me. We had a lot of fun, and she got a very warm bottom out of the deal. So it ended up being my turn in the long run. But I still felt unreasonably betrayed when she went to play with someone else first.

Yes, unreasonably. I don’t hold a claim on this woman; I don’t want to hold a claim on this woman. She’s funny and nice, and as I discovered (because it was our first time playing) she’s a good spanking partner. I’d certainly spank her again if she wanted me to. But she’s an independent woman, an adult with her own agency, and if she wants to get spanked by someone else before playing with me, that’s totally her call.

Unfortunately, our emotions aren’t always as mature as we wish they could be. I wish I could’ve looked at this woman getting spanked by someone else and thought “awesome, she’s having a great time, and I’m sure when the time comes she’ll have a great time with me too.” Instead, I thought “hey, it’s my turn to spank her! What the hell?” And that’s the wrong mentality to have, especially at a spanking party.