Of the many sexual things that I don’t understand, taking a cumwalk is one of them. Simply put, it’s when someone (usually a woman, so I’m going with those pronouns) walks through a public place after getting come on her face.

Of course you’ll want some examples.

Leaving aside the fact that this is technically forcing your kink on someone else because they didn’t consent to your exhibitionism, I kind of wonder what the point is of a cumwalk in the first place. Like, what is the goal? For someone to point out that “you have a little something on your face, dear”? For people to point and laugh? To turn other people on by making them want to be you or be the person who came on you?

Look, I get it. I love giving a facial as much as the next average dude — which is to say, if someone wants one, I’ll give them one, but it’s not the most important thing for me to do, sexually. If I give one, I like there to be a picture of it so I can reflect fondly upon it. But would I really want to be walking through (for example) the mall with a woman with come on her face? What would that do for me, exactly?

I’m sure it’s all about embarrassment and humiliation. Which is generally not something I’m into anyway. If you are, fine, but if I see someone doing a cumwalk I’m not going to be turned on.

Related: a study says that cumshots are actually not preferred by most people. Huh.