The August edition of Holiday Heat comes out on Thursday. Pre-order it now!

This year marks the first time since 2022 that I’m probably going to have to skip the Oasis Labor Day Spanking Party. I’ve given myself the guideline that if I have a new job that starts September 9 or later (I’m going out of town for a vendor event on September 6-8; more about that in another post) then I’ll go to Oasis. However, even though I budgeted money for the trip, and even though I’m still getting severance (for now), that money will eventually run out and Oasis tends to cost me something close to $2000, depending on plane tickets and food costs. In order to afford the plane tickets in the first place, I have to fly in Wednesday and fly out Tuesday, which means an extra two nights at the hotel, more food, and more Lyft trips. Oh, and I also have to have my dog looked after — either boarded or a live-in dog-sitter; either one costs $300-$400.

It hurts especially badly because the Oasis Labor Day party is where I first kissed my long-distance partner. We first played together at TASSP 2022, and after that we kept in touch. We determined we were interested in doing more than just spanking, and that Labor Day weekend is when it happened. Since then, we’ve had six in-person visits — she lives pretty far across the country, and there are no low-price flights to get where she lives (or from where she lives to where I live). Oasis was supposed to be number seven.

Long-distance relationships are hard — especially when the distance isn’t drivable. (I consider “drivable” to be “can make the drive in one day, sunrise to sunset, or about twelve hours.) My last LDR was with someone in middle Tennessee, which was only a four-hour drive, but I’ve also had them with people in Virginia (eight or nine hours, although I flew instead) and west Texas (too far to drive). At this point in my life, if I’m working, money isn’t usually an issue — I’m not rich, and I don’t make an absurd amount of money or anything, but I budget decently for trips and I’m really good at finding deals. Instead it’s usually time that’s the issue — specifically time off from work. The last time I went to visit my LDP she worked three of the five days I was there; the last time she came to visit me, she took seven days off because she was also here for GASP. And even while she was here I had to work for two days — my last two days at my old job, but at least they were telecommute days (she telecommuted while I was visiting as well).

I miss the hell out of her. And it’s painful that we’re not going to be able to see each other. I’m going to try to get out there to visit her before the end of the year, but it’s really going to depend on my work situation more than anything else. In the meantime, we’ll text, and we’ll talk on the phone, and we’ll pebble each other, and that’ll have to be enough.

And maybe, just maybe, I’ll get a job offer signed before August 25, which is the last day one can purchase a ticket for Oasis, and then I’ll manage to make the trip. Fingers crossed.