Recently Natalie said that she likes reading my blog because “I like knowing what’s going on in your mind.” And yes, I do write about spankings, and what goes on up there while I’m giving them.
But to be honest… nothing goes on up there while I’m giving a spanking. Not anymore.
Oh, sure, I’m concentrating on my partner, on her responses, on the way her body reacts to what I’m doing, the way she sounds, the way her skin feels — all of that stuff. But I’m not focusing on it actively. I’ve been giving spankings for more than twenty years, and it’s become pretty natural for me to do all of those things without thinking about them.
For the most part, spanking quiets my mind. I fill it with all the things I just mentioned, and I don’t worry about anything else. I don’t think about my dog, or my debts, or my evil ex-wife (the first one; the second one is not evil), or what I need to get at the grocery store, or what’s going on at work, or — after a few minutes, anyway — how turned on I get from seeing a well-spanked backside.
One of my occasional play partners has noticed that when I’m engaged in kinky activities I stop twitching. I have some tics in my face, neck, and hands, but the more relaxed I am, the less I do them. I barely notice them when I’m giving a spanking; I’ve watched videos of myself giving spankings and I’m only doing them on occasion while it’s happening. I guess when I have a quiet brain my whole body relaxes that much more.
When I think back to spankings I’ve given recently, I can process what I was doing, and how much fun I was having, but not what I was actually thinking about. Probably because I wasn’t really thinking about anything.
I guess it’s nice to know that there’s at least one thing out there that can quiet my mind.